Deep breath. You did it. You scheduled your first session. 

It probably took a lot of guts. 

You may feel anxious, hopeful, terrified, relieved, vulnerable, excited.

All of your feelings are valid. Normal even. To be expected.

What now? How do you prepare to meet the person that you may end up sharing your secrets with? The person that you may bare your soul to. Is it possible to prepare? Do you need to do anything special? 

When you make a dentist appointment, you probably tighten up your dental care routine? Floss a little more…okay, floss for the first time in ages… (we can be honest here). 

Therapy is a little different, you don’t have to do anything to “pull yourself together” before you show up. 

That being said, there are some things you might want to know that will help you feel more at ease about your first session. 

1. Paperwork:

The first session (maybe before) has a lot of paperwork to be completed. 

You will receive an intake packet that will have more questions than you ever thought possible to be answered. There will be questions about your family history, your history, your medical and mental health concerns, your primary relationships, your reason for seeking therapy, and probably some other questions too. Fill this out to the best of your ability. If there are things that you don’t know the answer to or are not comfortable writing out, don’t stress about it. Also in the intake packet, there will be some forms that explain the therapy process, HIPAA, informed consent, confidentiality and the limits of confidentiality, your therapist’s trainings, qualifications, and specializations, the practice’s policies and procedures, financial agreement or fee schedule, consent to bill insurance or to be private pay… it’s a lot. Most of the things you will just need to read over and sign though, so it’s not as much work for this part. (You may be a lucky one who gets to do all of this online, making it even easier!) 

2. Initial Introductions:

Upon arrival for your first session you will take a seat in the waiting room. Some offices have a receptionist to check in with, others do not (mine does not). Often there is a coffee maker or a water pitcher, typically, if it’s in the waiting area, you are welcome to help yourself. Your therapist will be out to greet you as soon as he or she is able. 

Once you are taken into the therapist’s office (or maybe while walking to the office), there will probably be the obligatory small talk… “How are you? Did you find the building alright?” etc… This will be quickly followed by your therapist telling you a little about themself. Next, the therapist will look over your paperwork, to ensure it is all in order. The therapist will likely ask if you have any questions about any of the policies or procedures and will explain the limits of confidentiality to you just to be sure it is all clear as possible. You can use this time to ask any clarifying questions about your therapist, what to expect from therapy, confidentiality, etc. Your therapist wants you to feel confident, safe, and comfortable to share anything you need or want to share. 

Note about confidentiality: Therapy is one of the few places in life where you can be assured that what you say there, stays there. However, there are a few exceptions to this. If your therapist has reason to believe that you are planning to end your life, he or she will be required to breach confidentiality in order to protect you from yourself. If your therapist has reason to believe that you are planning to kill or gravely harm someone else, the therapist has a duty to warn in order to protect the other person from you. Additionally, if there is suspicion of abuse, neglect, or exploitation of a child, elderly individual, or dependent adult, your therapist is mandated by law to report this to the appropriate authorities. Lastly, if clinical records are subpoenaed by a court of law, your therapist may be required to release certain information. Outside of these specific situations, your privacy is protected, and your sessions remain confidential. 

3. Into the nitty gritty: 

Now that all the boring paperwork is taken care of, the moment you’ve been waiting for has arrived. Time to share. This is the time for your therapist to start to get to know you. Your therapist probably has loads of questions to ask you about yourself, your history, your goals for therapy. This is your time and space to share whatever feels comfortable — your reasons for seeking therapy, the challenges you’ve been facing, and what you hope to gain from your work together. You’ll talk about what’s most important to you, begin identifying your goals, and discuss how therapy can support you in reaching them. There’s no pressure to dive into anything you’re not ready for; the pace is always set by you. The first session is about building a foundation of safety, trust, and partnership as you and your therapist start this journey together. 

4. What’s next:

After the first session, you will likely know whether or not your therapist is a good fit for you. You may know sometime during the session. My advice is to do two sessions before deciding if the therapist is going to be the one for you. However, if you know from session one that they are not someone you feel safe with or that they are not going to be a good fit for whatever reason, do not feel obligated to schedule another session with them! At the end of the session, many therapists will go ahead and try to schedule the next appointment. If you aren’t sure you want to schedule another for whatever reason, you can let them know that; if it seems too confrontational or stressful to you to share that with them, you can say something like “I’ll reach out when I’m ready to make another appointment”. I promise good therapists will not be offended if you don’t think they are a good fit for you! We want you to be comfortable with your therapist. I’ve learned over the years that many times, if the client doesn’t feel it’s a good fit, neither does the therapist! 

I hope this guide is helpful to you as you prepare to meet your new guide on your healing journey. Before long, the anxiety you have about going to therapy will be a thing of the past. 

Hopefully you find the best fit for you! 

Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have any questions or would like to schedule a phone consultation!